Tuesday, June 26, 2012


Timing is everything, even in love. And when you are not ready to commit, you could end up regretting it. Sometimes, timing rather than love decides who we end up being with or without.

Only some lucky people marry the loves of their lives. The rest marry the most suitable person who comes along when they are ready to settle down and the problem arise when you start comparing first touch , first hug , first kiss.

Even if the love of one's life appears when one is single, one may not be in the right frame of mind to recognize him or her as such.

And then love passes by.

Life is littered with near misses and lost opportunities.
We don’t get the understand what we really want unless it’s taken away from us.
We don’t get to love what we have in hand unless its In someone’s else hand, weird we humans we never satisfied, we are never total convinced unless its gone.
Is it our nature that we never understand unless we lose the chance then we give our selves an excuse of calling it experience.
Do we get the chances by luck of sometimes our destiny is right in front our eyes and we just miss it , do we really what they call brain ,,
I am not attached to the past , I am just thinking why things is working out to a certain way that we don’t understand , and I am totally sure that God gives us all the options we are just so blind to see what’s right and what’s wrong we have the power of the choice and we just screw everything up ,
I can remember one day I wrote about someone I used to have in the past “what I have with him is worth it, it is worth every lonely night, every tear i cry from missing him, and the pain I feel from not having him close, it is worth it because he is my one and only, when I picture my self years from now, I see only him. No matter how painful distance can be, not having him in my life would be worse”
I can remember that one day I wrote to him a text saying “ just the thought of being with you tomorrow is enough to get me through today ”

Guess what its over because it was a matter of choice that its over because it didn’t seem right ,
I’m not really sure if it was the love of my life or what , I don’t know if I will still get to feel the first touch I had , the first holding hand ,,,
All I know that I am not the one to be blamed , I was real , I wasn’t playing games , I wasn’t lying , My feeling was certain and right ..
At some point you’d have to let go of the past peacefully , with out hate without being ashamed of if , that what I always do , I remember the good day I had and the bad days , I remember the good moments and the inspiring seconds , the moments when I cried my self to sleep and hours of happiness ,,
Love your self , don’t miss your destiny and follow the signs , that’s my secrets tools for happiness ..

Let Go of it peacefully ,
Don’t forget to put on a smile J

Monday, June 18, 2012

Discovering Happiness

Me opening my eyes but its not late , jumped out of the bed ran to water boiler switched it on , and huge noise was out calling “ hey stupid I am empty” I added water I was hungry I don’t know why I opened the fridge got  out the plate of salad ate some and said “ you got to be kidding , when will you stop being on diet” with me saying to my self “ Shut the fuck up, till you fucken lose weight ” , Its always 2 voices talking inside of me the lazy , not motivated and the hyperactive crazy , enthusiastic voice .
Took my morning bath , and again there is no hot water , no one in the home to fix it but me and my little dogs , I was thinking how life and God was so fair with me lately ; because simply I am looking at things from different scope , lately I was so angry , I hate my self , I hated a lot of people who did me no good , but you know what  I discovered that i am wrong ,

I shouldn’t be angry because it doesn’t worth it, I discovered that I am really nice person and I should be love the way I am because I been seeing me alone out talking to my self, being sarcastic and nice to my self and for those people who made me no good, actually they made me realize how I am better off without them and they made me re-evaluate my self frankly.

Lately I am so happy because I got back to an old friend who I really loved in my childhood, we use to play a lot, swim all day, jump in to the pool for hours and hours, we use to take moon tan we thought when we was young that “since sun makes your skin darker, moon makes us lighter “and we use to lay back with eyes closed taking moon tan .. using each other soap, towels, sand forks ,shampoo , rid bicycles , playing on the sand , building castles , GOOD OLD DAYS when the biggest problem back then was not be able to watch our favorite kids movie ..

The girl is so nice, we laugh a lot, we talk a lot we fight a lot over those small things and we agree and disagree , but we are never mad from one another, she is a little bit crazy and na├»ve in a lot of things but she grew old to be strong, bold and crazy and that what I love about her , even we stopped seeing each other for years;  promptly we was back on track , singing loudly in the car, driving madly on high ways , hearing house music day dreaming with beats , acting as we don’t give a fuck about any thing , I hate her when she closes her mind for options and just stop thinking , and when  her voice is very loud when she is fighting on the phone .. But I love her and I accept her the way she is, I won‘t try to change her.
I really don’t understand a lot of things happening and I don’t understand timing , she was back in my life in a time I was so not me in it , and then things happened not good in her life and I am there for her and she is there for me  , I don’t understand if that’s destiny or ones choice .. People who I though that life will never take from me are the people who is not their any more and the people who I though will never be in my life any more are the ones who in it now... Weird, common sense is very uncommon.
Lately I learnt a lot; I noticed that the true power is grounded by spiritual awareness. It comes from trusting your inner wisdom standing your ground and speaking the truth,
I have discovered that happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched and those who have tried, those who only appreciate the importance of people who touched their life.

I am now fully convinced that until you’re ready to look foolish, you’ll never have the possibility of being great.
Also lately I was dissatisfied with my job , looking only on negative thoughts till yesterday I was reading an article about women who made a huge success in business , if you don’t know Van Wang she is the world best wedding dress designer you can’t look bad in any of there amazing work of art . She said in the report “Don’t be afraid to take time to learn, it’s good to work for other people, I worked for other people for 20 years, they paid me to learn”... She made me take a deep breath and say to my self “Honey!! Take it easy, what you want won’t come easily, it would take time and balls”.

Also I’m convinced that one of the greatest titles we can have is "old friend". We never appreciate how important old friends are until we are older. The problem is we need to start our old friendships when we are young. We then have to nurture and grow those friendships over our middle age when a busy life and changing geographies can cause us to neglect those friends. Today is the day to invest in those people we hope will call us 'old friend" in the years to come..
 Don’t for het to put on a smile
Quote of the day

Sunday, June 17, 2012

I feel pretty, oh so pretty

I opened my eyes ,  I looked at the alarm clock , its said “ hey stupid wake the fuck up because its 8:15” I cursed my name , I ran out side the bed ran to the kitchen put the boiler on , sent to the bathroom took a shower with me screaming again only cold water is available “ I said okay I can do this , my heart was pumping was freaking cold .. ran to the room dressed , rushed to the kitchen made my coffee , and a cheese sandwich looked at the watch it was already 9:15 my inner me “ when the hell you will be back on track ”. then I replied back “ soon when the light is turned on again ”  I looked at my car side mirror with me shocked “ my mouth was just like Pamela Anderson as if I made a filler with Botox “ what the fuck “ and shit !!! it freaking hurts , I panicked then I remembered that the stupid me ate hazelnut which I am allergic from and again my mouth swollen I can’t even talk properly .. Okay let’s sing

I feel pretty, oh so pretty
I feel pretty, and witty and gay
And I pity any girl who isn't me today

I feel charming, oh so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel
And so pretty that I hardly can believe I'm real

See the pretty girl in that mirror there?
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face, such a pretty dress
Such a pretty smile, such a pretty me!

I feel stunning and entrancing
Feel like running and dancing for joy
For I'm loved by a pretty, wonderful boy!

Have you met my good friend maria?
The craziest girl on the block
You'll know her the minute you see her
She's the one who is in an advanced state of shock
She thinks she's in love she thinks she's in spain(la la la)
She isn't in love, she's merely insane
It must be the heat
Or some rare desease(la la la)
Or to much to eat
Or maybe its fleas
Keep away from her!
Send for chino!
This is not the Maria we know
Modest and pure
Polite and refined (la la la)
Well-bred and mature
And out of her mind!

I feel pretty, oh so pretty, that the city should give me its key!
A comitee, should be organized to honour me
I feel dizzy
I feel sunny
I feel fizzy and funny and fine!
And so pretty
Miss america can just resign(Girls:la la la la la la la la la la, lala!)
See the pretty girl in that mirror there?

Okay now what I still feel my lips hurt, but I know it won’t last long lts look at the fact that its sexy and I am confident in my own skin and guess what ‘ I don’t care ‘ ..

This is me , when I am sad I sing , when I am about to cry I laugh my self out , guess what I will never change .. I will be the crazy young women who dance , laugh , sing , sometimes cry for no good reason , who mess around who will travel alone and still feels that she has the best company ever , who will work her ass off every single day to prove to the world that she fucken can do it by her self …

Been suffering lately from dissatisfaction in the work place so when I went to my office I started goggling articles and tips to get back the spark as I miss me being energetic the work place ,

Do you remember last time you was in a date or in love you were happy you started to get ready hours earlier than you normally do before getting dressed ,

You was so focused on little details , you was happy you was light and felt good , do u remember your first day at work when u waked up earlier dressed up so tidy and wanted to get that professional look .

In many ways, a new job is like a love affair. The first stage is excitement. It can last from an hour to many years. You think to yourself, “This job will pay me more money than I’ve ever earned before. The clients will be wonderful to deal with. I’m going to learn so much and do really exciting things.” The novelty of the job keeps your energy high. You are happy because you are so productive, and you’re more productive because you are so happy.
Then the second stage, reality, sets in. You still enjoy the work you do, but you begin to notice some of the irritants and difficulties. It bothers you that all the phones are ringing when you walk in the door. Deadlines seem endless and impossible. It becomes harder to arrive early or stay late. The novelty starts to wear off. And, like love, your job has a third stage too disillusion.

Jobs, as in love, it’s very important for the pendulum to swing back. You need to work to regain the exhilaration of the first stage. Such excitement is essential to a fulfilling life. Think about what you did to keep the thrill in your love life. Maybe the two of you relived your first date at that little country restaurant, or you thought to thank your loved one for being kind and generous. In short, you remembered to see the person you first fell in love with.
Apply this same technique to your career. Rekindle the thrill you felt when you first began your job. You must have had good reasons for taking it. What were they? Make a list of them, and expect to experience those joys again in your daily routine.
Begin each day with a smile. Anticipate having a productive, stimulating day. Isn’t that how you used to come to work in the morning? If you really expect to be productive, I guarantee that almost nothing can stop you. Here are some practical staying-in-love techniques:
Have a good breakfast to give you the energy and protein, which you so badly need first thing in the morning.
Dress with as much pride and attention to detail as you did on your first day of work.
Start each day with motivated people who talk about the good things in their lives. Once a week or so, take the initiative to get up a little earlier and go to breakfast with some of these people. I’m a member of a group that does just that. It’s a very special way to start the day.
Get to work as early as you can and spend some quiet time settling in before everyone else arrives. If this is hard, offer yourself some small personal reward. (Mine is that first lingering cup of coffee, all alone, while opening my very exciting email.)
 Don't forget to have a nice day with a smile :)

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Eat , Pray , & love

I am at my desk  at work , was active in the morning I finished everything I had to do in a matter of hours and I was reading an amazing book for Elizabeth Gilbert “Eat, pray and love “ and I decided I would buy another book by her called Committed ,
In the book I really felt someone is saying my ideas my emotions my point of view except from the part that she went to Italy , India and Indonesia searching for  happiness for the peace of mind .
Recently I suffered from a breakup , not really a breakup because there was nothing to be broken in the whole story but my little heart over this nice man who I really liked, who would look at your eyes and see through you, who I respected so much, loved so much, trusted so much, who was so generous and caring but guess what he is mentally mad and ugly, one day he miss me the second day sorry I can’t complete my life with you now maybe later but not now,
i won't say he is bad but he is not good either and its not to be shared here , atleaset i'll try to keep this sad story for me .
 My mistake was that I forgotten all the pain that he left the first time acted as an angel who would just forget what mean people do and just again and again be nice to them .. I am so sorry for my self.. The weird this I am a clever young women who rarely doesn’t use her mind but guess what I never used my mind  with this guy even once, my heart was happy and my instinct was right I danced with the flow but I flipped on my leg afterwards .
One night after a long conversation over the phone, I won’t go to personal over here , I was crying and crying I kept asking GOD , why , and how come , and so many questions I was repeating then I kept saying GOD help me , help me , help me , help me with my eyes so closed on the floor of my room it was dark late at night , I kept repeating saying Dear God I am your little girl ,you put this person in my life and now you are taking him again why , with repeating help , help .. then all of a sudden the tears stopped, I stopped talking , I took my self up from the floor , but I felt it wasn’t  the sad me something I didn’t understand a wisdom voice that was speaking inside of me with my own tone of voice with my own speech , “Grab your self up little baby girl , you deserve love those wide sparkle eyes won’t created for crying ”, I went to bed squeezed my pillow in to my chest and from that day I chosen only to be happy .. My God is always been kind to me.

My God is magnificent I love him , I talk to him all the time , I pray to him in my heart , I believe in GOD so much , every time something happen to me I look to the sky and speak to him , from 2day I was driving and a women was trying to pass the street she was pregnant holding a plastic bag full of potatoes and a little kid in her hand , I stopped for her to pass , she looked at me and smile and in that moment I felt someone is whispering in my ears “ Thank you ” ,  I looked at the sky and said thank you , with me was about to hit the car in front of me , I said again with a funny tone talking to my God “ Okay , I’ll focus ” ..I do good I feel good I do bad I feel bad this is my religion.. This is my way of thinking.
I really don’t know who people really don’t believe that there is a GOD up there, who made this universe the creator; I really feel pity for them they never get those silent hearts filling moments. They never really feel the greatness of the creator.
I'm so happy now my figure have never been like this before my heart is so in peace Thank God for the Yoga i make always its amazing how it makes me feel flying

I am planning a trip to India soon I know I will find what I ve been searching for along of time which is a peace of mind with lots of meditations , and Yoga pauses , and practicing Ashram , and doing the Japa Malas and worrier yoga pause .. Auuuuuh I can’t wait ..

I don’t know if some one is reading this , I really don’t care , I just love to write and will always do , ..
Don’t forget to smile